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Quit Welcoming Insecurity as a Friend by Mary DeMuth

May 12, 2013

insecurity

Are you sick of insecurity?   Or has it been your friend these many years, eating dinner with you, whispering your worthlessness whenever it can? It’s time to say SCAT. Why? Because insecurity does nothing for you. It undermines your confidence. It makes you feel like you have nothing to contribute to the world. It makes you fear and shrink back from what God has called you to do.

And even when you experience success, Insecurity howls at you, tells you it’s probably a fluke.

I’ve been there. I am there.

I recently had a conversation where I let insecurity taint my words <http://www.marydemuth.com/2010/05/approval-money/> . I demeaned my own success, preferring to see what I hadn’t accomplished, forgetting what I had. The person I shared with was shocked. “But when I see you, I see success. You’ve arrived. You’ve made it.”

Isn’t it funny that even when you do find success, insecurity rips away the part of you that can rejoice in it? Instead there is always a need to prove your worth more and more and more until you work so hard, you end up exhausted and unsatisfied.

We need to see insecurity as an intruder instead of a familiar friend. Sure, we’ve come to adapt to insecurity’s presence, become quite comfortable with its mean words in our heads, but that doesn’t mean we can’t realistically look at insecurity and give it the boot.

The opposite of insecurity isn’t security as much as it’s peace. It’s not that war won’t come or pain or hurt. It’s that when it does, we have the peace to be okay with ourselves in the midst of it. When life smacks us down, when we’re more apt to welcome the voice of insecurity, we can instead ask the Prince of Peace to settle our worth, calm our hearts, and give us peace.

Here’s the difference between the two:

  • Insecure folks blame others for their lack. Peaceful folks take blame when needed and deflect when it’s not warranted.
  • Insecure folks belittle others or themselves with harsh words. Peaceful folks look for ways to bolster another and aren’t afraid to say, “I am a wonderful, well-loved person.”
  • Insecure folks wear masks to cover up their shortcomings. Peaceful folks are authentic without fear.
  • Insecure folks hide. Peaceful folks live openhearted lives, risking in relationships.

So where are you in this list? Have you welcomed insecurity as a friend? What do you struggle with most?

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